It's the One Week Return Visit to the Clinic day. We have heard about this since we made the first inquiry phone call 8 weeks ago. It's a big day - you hopefully will get tubes out, get incisions checked, any bruising is noted, you talk about functions returning, you might get some Viagra, and you have a Cystogram to check on the new bladder/urethra connection (the anastomosis). I have come to believe the Anastomosis is something like gold - it is to be protected, or maybe its magic that you have to believe in because it holds your future, I don't know, but for prostatectomy men - its very important and its one reason to hire a very experienced surgeon.
After the 3 hour trek, we arrive a little early for our appointment and they say, "we are ready for you, please go down the hall for your Cystogram". We go through the doors and this is the first time I, me, the spouse, is told to wait outside. I wait and wait and think, "how long can this x-ray take?". After about an hour watching people pass by and go through doors with swipe cards, a white-coated woman appears and escorts me to an exam room where I later learned they stopped mid-pathology report conversation when my husband asked, "Shouldn't my wife be here for this?"
More about me: I always have a gazillion questions and I am often ahead of everyone else, so he knows me......my blessing can be a curse. Just talk to me in your language, I get it, all of it. Any words that are new I will look up, any questions I can research - I can read journals, I can find what is relevant, and I will be on top of it as quickly as I can. I have worked in many areas of health care over my 50+ years and I need to know as much as anyone involved in the case - or more, perhaps.
So, the PA gives a brief overture before the Pathology report - the Crystal ball to our future. She covers rehab, meds, incision care, then gives a few comments on the Pathology report, which we are reminded we will have a copy of when we leave. "Wait a minute, step back, you said Clinical Stage T3a?" "Extensions beyond the prostate?" The presurgical DRE exam by 'the Master' came in at a T1C - we skipped over a stage. Now, my questions need to start formulating..."Give me that report right now, so I can pour over it while I am here and can ask questions...". These are my thoughts, not my words because I am being the unobtrusive spouse assisting with leakage that is now pouring out the hole where the tube was located just a few minutes ago. "How long will it take for this hole to close off?" This is getting to be a lot to do, and think about, and I am glad there isn't another person in the room because it is too small and my brain can't handle any other input at the moment. The PA leaves and fluid is gushing out, so I find pads and 4X4s in the cupboards to soak it all up. Boy, I'm glad I know how to open a sterile 4X4 package......
So I have one important question..."What about the Surgical margins?" * NOTE - If you are in the Cancer boat facing the big waves of surgery, you need to know about surgical margins - its the answer to "Did they get it all? It's more gold.
"The margins are clear" - words to my ears and to my eyes later on. "I will think about this all later, Rhett...."
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